"Is that your best price for the squid?"

Here is a vendor at the fish market, negotiating a deal with his supplier on his iPhone. He has to hop up on the plastic stool to reach the counter, but that doesn’t slow him down much. I read an article in the paper today about a young Chinese woman who started her own vegetable business against some big hurdles, but “she is made of tough stuff and preserved”. In three years, she has achieved annual revenues of 1.5 million yuan (that’s a lot of lettuce). She doesn’t look much older than this little fishmonger.

Here is a practical solution to corral this squirmy toddler in the stationary shop! Throughout the street markets, you will find the shopkeeper’s babies and children hanging out while mom and grandmom tend to their customers. Behind the shelves, I often see makeshift lawn chair beds with baby quilts for afternoon naps.

Shanghai is pretty much… indescribable, and certainly not what I expected. A few words come to mind: psychedelic, yummy, boisterous, practical and smelly. A few things that seemed odd at first, now I hardly notice:

• The sky scrapers and bridges are lit up at night with brightly flashing, ever changing patterns.
• Horns have a language of their own: tiny toot means pay attention, two short toots means keep moving, one long blast means my vehicle is bigger than yours, and so on.
• Motorcycles drive anywhere they like, including the sidewalks and outdoor markets. The other day, a guy was shopping among the tiny stalls of a market, bought several items and never got off his bike.
• Often, the sidewalks are impassable due to the number of parked bikes, so everyone walks in the street.
• There is no adhesive on the envelopes.
• There is no need to queue up in line, just crowd your way in and keep your elbows out, talking loudly.
• Split pants for babies are very convenient, just hold out the child and let him go on the sidewalk, no need to change diapers.
• Store clerks tend to crowd right in between me and the shelf two feet in front of me, needing to restock, refold or clean at that moment. They make sure I know that I am in their way.
• We hear firecrackers on Saturday mornings from the temple.
• Large fur lined gloves are taped on to the bike handles with duct tape. Stick in hands and rev it up. Very practical.
• There are rarely women’s shoes in the stores larger than about size 7. The clerks giggle and gasp when I ask for my size.
• There are street sweepers who seem to be responsible for a particular block. When their broom wears out, they pull some branches off a tree and bind up a new broom with string.
• You can’t imagine how many things can be transported on bicycles and tricycle trailers. Just name it.
• Many neighborhood restaurants have a large wok burner or 3 ft bun steamer right out on the sidewalk in front of their dining room.
• “Hey lady lady, want buy watch?” is the common greeting in the markets.
• Chinglish signs are hilarious, such as on an elevator: “Not use lift if catches on fire”.